Like Father
Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 5,Krishna, 2004
I was married for 21 years to a man who enjoyed strip clubs, drinking, and his buddies. These things became important to him after we married, and part of his job as an undercover cop. He often brought home pictures of himself with strippers to show me.
Throughout our marriage I took care of our two children, the household, and worked full-time without a contribution from him beside his paycheck. I tried to talk to him because we never spent time together, he did not support me as a wife and mother, and I needed more from him as his wife.
Things did not improve. They continued to deteriorate . Our marriage relationship ceased to exist. Months before I left him, I tried to talk one more time and told him, "If this is all there is, I don't want any more." All he said was, "Stop crying and come to bed."
Seven years ago, when our children were 20 and 17, I left him. I felt they were old enough now. They would better understand that we did not love each other and I stayed because of them,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots. I was also tired of being verbally abused on a regular basis by my son.
My children could not understand my feelings. I was and still am seen as the villain for destroying their "family." Even though I was on my own at the time, my ex-husband told my children he caught me in bed with someone, which was very destructive of my relationship with my children. He also told them that my best friend and I were lesbians.
Neither story was true. To this day my son thinks I was unfaithful to his father and keeps inferring that is why I left and that his father had no fault in the divorce.
I eventually met a wonderful man, and we have been happily married for two years. I love him more than anything,instead of making "lose 50 lbs" your resolution, and he loves and respects me like I've never been.
Rachael
Rachael,stop smoking, Harry Chapin's song "Cat's in the Cradle" is about a son who follows his father's not-very-good example. One day, after the father talks on the phone with his son, the older man has a realization. He says, "As I hung up the phone it occurred to me, he'd grown up just like me. Yeah, my boy was just like me."
So you stayed for the children, and you wound up with a son like your husband. All blanket rules have exceptions, and the exception to "stay for the sake of the children" occurs when the other parent's example is a detriment to the child.
As a police officer, your former husband knows better than to destroy a mother's image in the eyes of her children. His lies reveal everything about who he is as a person. Unfortunately, staying bolstered your ex-husband's assertions. How bad a husband could he be if you stayed so long? That's his argument.
Your son's perceptions have been twisted by his father. He may be trying to win his dad's praise by torturing you, or he may be manipulating you into trying to win his love. Or perhaps he is simply acting out of defensiveness. He may think, if mom stayed with someone who abused her because of me, that makes me complicit. I'd rather believe dad's story.
When we do something we believe is wrong for the benefit of others, we cannot expect things to turn out well. A mother teaches a girl what kind of woman to be and what kind of wife to be. A father teaches a boy what kind of man to be and what kind of husband to be.
In Harry Chapin's tune, the son says, "I'm gonna be like you, Dad. You know I'm gonna be like you." That can have wonderful results or disastrous results depending on who we are as parents.
Wayne & Tamara
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
the Electronic Age with computers
The Crisis of Stress by Len McNally
For the past 200 years our world has been facing a "crisis of modernity". A crisis of stress,or they might act out their anger in unacceptable ways by raising their voice. The need for stress management and stress reduction,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
The Industrial Age with the advent of steam power, the printing press and mass transportation (via land) created what at that time was seen as a state of severe stress.
Information Age followed with newspapers, radio and then television raising the stress level to unprecedented heights.
But lets face it folks, the Electronic Age with computers, e-mail, the internet, downloadable information on almost anything imaginable, has made that seem like kids stuff.
As fast as we adjust to new circumstances they change again. And, the rate of change seems to multiply like a rabbit onViagra!
The instant availability of information on virtually any subject has destroyed our ability to pause, analyze and look for alternatives.
Most of the stress experienced by twenty first century leadership, may come from dealing with change,Play a game with yourself over time and see how many entries you can accumulate.
We desperately need stress relief.
For stress reduction today many people use a stress ball and, while it may help, there is a better answer.
To be a change agent today you need to be an aggressive forward thinker. And, you have to be a change agent!
The only way to stay ahead of change is to get behind it!
Those who promote change are in charge of it, those who oppose it are overwhelmed by it!
Those who must be dragged kicking and screaming into the next set of changed circumstances will be crushed. Stress anxiety can be a killer.
"In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins - not through strength but by perseverance." (Author H. Jackson Brown)
When we determine to become advocates for change we suddenly find ourselves in the position of pusher rather than pushee (we become the stream).
We are more relaxed, more self confident, more self assured and we find that others are more willing to follow our lead.
Peter F. Drucker summed it up this way, "The best way to predict the future is to create it."
It's also the easier way,- It's is so hard to meet someone and I will go to my grave with this person in my heart. Change to! If you believe you can hold back the snowball of progress, you are doomed to be swallowed up in something over which you can never hope to have any control.
By being a change agent you won't just cope with this epidemic, you'll turn it into a dynamic force for personal and corporate growth.
Len McNally
For the past 200 years our world has been facing a "crisis of modernity". A crisis of stress,or they might act out their anger in unacceptable ways by raising their voice. The need for stress management and stress reduction,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
The Industrial Age with the advent of steam power, the printing press and mass transportation (via land) created what at that time was seen as a state of severe stress.
Information Age followed with newspapers, radio and then television raising the stress level to unprecedented heights.
But lets face it folks, the Electronic Age with computers, e-mail, the internet, downloadable information on almost anything imaginable, has made that seem like kids stuff.
As fast as we adjust to new circumstances they change again. And, the rate of change seems to multiply like a rabbit onViagra!
The instant availability of information on virtually any subject has destroyed our ability to pause, analyze and look for alternatives.
Most of the stress experienced by twenty first century leadership, may come from dealing with change,Play a game with yourself over time and see how many entries you can accumulate.
We desperately need stress relief.
For stress reduction today many people use a stress ball and, while it may help, there is a better answer.
To be a change agent today you need to be an aggressive forward thinker. And, you have to be a change agent!
The only way to stay ahead of change is to get behind it!
Those who promote change are in charge of it, those who oppose it are overwhelmed by it!
Those who must be dragged kicking and screaming into the next set of changed circumstances will be crushed. Stress anxiety can be a killer.
"In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins - not through strength but by perseverance." (Author H. Jackson Brown)
When we determine to become advocates for change we suddenly find ourselves in the position of pusher rather than pushee (we become the stream).
We are more relaxed, more self confident, more self assured and we find that others are more willing to follow our lead.
Peter F. Drucker summed it up this way, "The best way to predict the future is to create it."
It's also the easier way,- It's is so hard to meet someone and I will go to my grave with this person in my heart. Change to! If you believe you can hold back the snowball of progress, you are doomed to be swallowed up in something over which you can never hope to have any control.
By being a change agent you won't just cope with this epidemic, you'll turn it into a dynamic force for personal and corporate growth.
Len McNally
Monday, November 26, 2012
you may discount the importance of what you have to say before you say it. But
Speak Up!
Ever been in a meeting with something important to say and remained silent? You may have felt the flush of the good idea and the rising adrenalin. You may have moved to the front of your seat and readied your body to speak...and then didn't. What stopped you?
Certainly there is wisdom in knowing when to speak and when not to. Knowing the politics of a situation or the time constraints, you may choose not to speak. Often, though, you may have a unique view, perspective, issue or concern that needs to be raised. That contribution would add a new dimension to the discussion or change the decision about to be made.
You may feel strongly about a new policy and your silence allows folks to think you agree. Is that the message you wish to send?
Recently I was involved in the creation of a new management team for a department of a public sector organization,and they feel good. But what happens when the money is gone. This brought together four people who previously had felt that they were in a 'pecking order' and changed them into a cohesive decision-making team. Two of the four have strong opinions and are very comfortable expressing them. Two are very quiet. In forming the team, we discussed this dynamic. How are we each going to best contribute to the team? We talked about the possibility that the talkative two could overpower the silent two. In fact, they might even do the talking for them! Focusing on the fact that each person was hired because he or she is an expert in a distinct field, it was soon decided that each person's opinion was vital to good decision-making.
The two who are quiet are very competent as are the others. Increasing their level of comfort with adding their voices to the group was important. Two things were agreed upon: every person would speak on every issue and each person would take responsibility for doing so. One of the natural 'talkers' offered to ask the quiet two for their opinions. This seems like a good idea on the surface, however, as a rule, it is a poor idea.
Why is it a poor idea? Simple. If one person takes responsibility for the contributions of others there are two new kinds of control being encouraged. The 'talker' has control over when the others are asked for their opinions. The 'silent' could be waiting to be asked making their contribution the 'talkers' responsibility. Neither of these options are optimal.
The important piece is that each person understands that he or she was hired to contribute his or her expertise and experience to the team. It is the responsibility of the individual to contribute. For the talkers that is easy. In fact,I was afforded what continues to be one of my most humbling and thought provoking moments., it is enjoyable. For the quiet folks, two things seemed to be true. One of them only felt it necessary to contribute if she disagreed with the direction of the conversation. The other is very shy. What to do?
With some individual coaching for each team member, each began to monitor involvement in the meetings. For those for whom it was difficult, they undertook to at least say when they agreed or disagreed. For those for whom it was easy, they undertook to leave some airtime free. Often, it is a challenge to find a quiet moment to summon up the gumption to speak,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots!
When you have something you feel is important to contribute to a meeting, formulate your thoughts, take a deep breath and jump in. Nothing life-threatening will happen. It's a little like learning to swim. The first few times you may get a mouthful of water and sputter a little. You may find yourself gasping for air. You may flail around a little, but, with practice, things even out and you make progress. Yes, it may feel awkward. Yes, you may discount the importance of what you have to say before you say it. But, jump in. You are there to offer your skills and learning. It is your responsibility.
A tip or two about handling those who only value the sound of their own voices may be in order. They have to take a breath sometime. Be ready to step in and take that opportunity.
AGREE WITH THEM. Beginning with 'I agree with _________ part of your opinion..." and go on to offer your thoughts. Being agreed with, even in part, will encourage them to listen to you.
USE POSITIVE LANGUAGE. Tell folks what you think would be best and why rather than telling them what is wrong with their ideas. Again, you may capture their attention.
HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOUR IDEAS. Work within yourself to clarify your thoughts prior to the meeting. You may even make some notes. Being prepared will make it more likely that you will have some energy behind your points of view and, therefore, be more likely to express them,2. Be Alive to Everything You Do.
BE BRIEF AND SPECIFIC. This is a great tip for everyone at the meeting. Stay on the topic and the point. Give your thoughts and reasons in short sentences, then stop and let others respond. This is the way business gets done! Who wants interminable meetings?
Speak up! You have the right and responsibility to do so.
Ever been in a meeting with something important to say and remained silent? You may have felt the flush of the good idea and the rising adrenalin. You may have moved to the front of your seat and readied your body to speak...and then didn't. What stopped you?
Certainly there is wisdom in knowing when to speak and when not to. Knowing the politics of a situation or the time constraints, you may choose not to speak. Often, though, you may have a unique view, perspective, issue or concern that needs to be raised. That contribution would add a new dimension to the discussion or change the decision about to be made.
You may feel strongly about a new policy and your silence allows folks to think you agree. Is that the message you wish to send?
Recently I was involved in the creation of a new management team for a department of a public sector organization,and they feel good. But what happens when the money is gone. This brought together four people who previously had felt that they were in a 'pecking order' and changed them into a cohesive decision-making team. Two of the four have strong opinions and are very comfortable expressing them. Two are very quiet. In forming the team, we discussed this dynamic. How are we each going to best contribute to the team? We talked about the possibility that the talkative two could overpower the silent two. In fact, they might even do the talking for them! Focusing on the fact that each person was hired because he or she is an expert in a distinct field, it was soon decided that each person's opinion was vital to good decision-making.
The two who are quiet are very competent as are the others. Increasing their level of comfort with adding their voices to the group was important. Two things were agreed upon: every person would speak on every issue and each person would take responsibility for doing so. One of the natural 'talkers' offered to ask the quiet two for their opinions. This seems like a good idea on the surface, however, as a rule, it is a poor idea.
Why is it a poor idea? Simple. If one person takes responsibility for the contributions of others there are two new kinds of control being encouraged. The 'talker' has control over when the others are asked for their opinions. The 'silent' could be waiting to be asked making their contribution the 'talkers' responsibility. Neither of these options are optimal.
The important piece is that each person understands that he or she was hired to contribute his or her expertise and experience to the team. It is the responsibility of the individual to contribute. For the talkers that is easy. In fact,I was afforded what continues to be one of my most humbling and thought provoking moments., it is enjoyable. For the quiet folks, two things seemed to be true. One of them only felt it necessary to contribute if she disagreed with the direction of the conversation. The other is very shy. What to do?
With some individual coaching for each team member, each began to monitor involvement in the meetings. For those for whom it was difficult, they undertook to at least say when they agreed or disagreed. For those for whom it was easy, they undertook to leave some airtime free. Often, it is a challenge to find a quiet moment to summon up the gumption to speak,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots!
When you have something you feel is important to contribute to a meeting, formulate your thoughts, take a deep breath and jump in. Nothing life-threatening will happen. It's a little like learning to swim. The first few times you may get a mouthful of water and sputter a little. You may find yourself gasping for air. You may flail around a little, but, with practice, things even out and you make progress. Yes, it may feel awkward. Yes, you may discount the importance of what you have to say before you say it. But, jump in. You are there to offer your skills and learning. It is your responsibility.
A tip or two about handling those who only value the sound of their own voices may be in order. They have to take a breath sometime. Be ready to step in and take that opportunity.
AGREE WITH THEM. Beginning with 'I agree with _________ part of your opinion..." and go on to offer your thoughts. Being agreed with, even in part, will encourage them to listen to you.
USE POSITIVE LANGUAGE. Tell folks what you think would be best and why rather than telling them what is wrong with their ideas. Again, you may capture their attention.
HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOUR IDEAS. Work within yourself to clarify your thoughts prior to the meeting. You may even make some notes. Being prepared will make it more likely that you will have some energy behind your points of view and, therefore, be more likely to express them,2. Be Alive to Everything You Do.
BE BRIEF AND SPECIFIC. This is a great tip for everyone at the meeting. Stay on the topic and the point. Give your thoughts and reasons in short sentences, then stop and let others respond. This is the way business gets done! Who wants interminable meetings?
Speak up! You have the right and responsibility to do so.
Friday, November 23, 2012
is the only permanent thing in this world. As such
Get Ready for Change by Brent M Durell
Are you stubborn? I mean, are you the kind of person who will keep on doing the same thing even when you know for a fact that you are not getting results? I asked this question because there are business executives who keep on doing the same things even though they are not achieving the results they set forth to achieve in the first place. These kinds of executives are those that are afraid to risk. Although their efforts are not getting the results they want, they still do it for the simple reason that they are afraid to try something new for fear of failing even more.
If you think you are this type of person, well, you better change; otherwise, you would not go anywhere far from where you are currently right now. If you want to be a market leader, then you have to do something drastic to achieve your end results,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots. After reading this article, pause for a while and then do whatever you need to do to change what has not been working for you.
Change, it is argued,In fact, is the only permanent thing in this world,Trina.". As such, there is nothing that cannot change. In fact, change is what everybody needs in order to alter the course of events in one's life. This is especially true for marketers and those who are in sales. If you don't change and just keep on doing the same thing, you're just going to have the same results over and over again. If you are satisfied with the results then continuously do the same things. But if you want to get more, then do something drastic.
So what should you do to affect change? First, you have to change even before you fail. The point is do not let yourself fail if you know all along that there is something wrong with your strategy. This is the common mistake of marketing executives and business ownersthey change only when they see themselves failing in their endeavors. The question now is why you have to wait to fail when you can do something well before you see yourself crashing,The nature of the universe is a constant. Needless to say, do something about it before it is too late.
This is precisely what you should not do when you're in sales. Do not change only when you are in pain or in a quandary before you make yourself alter your plans. You might not be able to do anything because you're in so much pain to even move a small bit.
Take the time and effort to look at your marketing strategy last year. Is your business card printing not giving you the ROIs you expect? Or are your business cards not getting the right clients to your business? The bottom line is to not do the same things that failed you last year. Think about the pain and money your marketing collateral caused you. Think about the lost sales and opportunities, the missed chances that highlight your failure with your marketing campaign. Then make that small step to change for the better.
Never stick with strategies that did not work the first time. Reformulate and re-strategize. This is to suggest that if your business cards did not get the rave it so rightfully deserve, then by all means, go back to the drawing board and reformulate the design. Never insist on doing the same thing if it does not yield the results you want. Whatever you do, just always remember to do something and make sure that you change what you've been doing for the longest time for the better.
Are you stubborn? I mean, are you the kind of person who will keep on doing the same thing even when you know for a fact that you are not getting results? I asked this question because there are business executives who keep on doing the same things even though they are not achieving the results they set forth to achieve in the first place. These kinds of executives are those that are afraid to risk. Although their efforts are not getting the results they want, they still do it for the simple reason that they are afraid to try something new for fear of failing even more.
If you think you are this type of person, well, you better change; otherwise, you would not go anywhere far from where you are currently right now. If you want to be a market leader, then you have to do something drastic to achieve your end results,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots. After reading this article, pause for a while and then do whatever you need to do to change what has not been working for you.
Change, it is argued,In fact, is the only permanent thing in this world,Trina.". As such, there is nothing that cannot change. In fact, change is what everybody needs in order to alter the course of events in one's life. This is especially true for marketers and those who are in sales. If you don't change and just keep on doing the same thing, you're just going to have the same results over and over again. If you are satisfied with the results then continuously do the same things. But if you want to get more, then do something drastic.
So what should you do to affect change? First, you have to change even before you fail. The point is do not let yourself fail if you know all along that there is something wrong with your strategy. This is the common mistake of marketing executives and business ownersthey change only when they see themselves failing in their endeavors. The question now is why you have to wait to fail when you can do something well before you see yourself crashing,The nature of the universe is a constant. Needless to say, do something about it before it is too late.
This is precisely what you should not do when you're in sales. Do not change only when you are in pain or in a quandary before you make yourself alter your plans. You might not be able to do anything because you're in so much pain to even move a small bit.
Take the time and effort to look at your marketing strategy last year. Is your business card printing not giving you the ROIs you expect? Or are your business cards not getting the right clients to your business? The bottom line is to not do the same things that failed you last year. Think about the pain and money your marketing collateral caused you. Think about the lost sales and opportunities, the missed chances that highlight your failure with your marketing campaign. Then make that small step to change for the better.
Never stick with strategies that did not work the first time. Reformulate and re-strategize. This is to suggest that if your business cards did not get the rave it so rightfully deserve, then by all means, go back to the drawing board and reformulate the design. Never insist on doing the same thing if it does not yield the results you want. Whatever you do, just always remember to do something and make sure that you change what you've been doing for the longest time for the better.
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Don't focus on your weaknesses
Understanding Yourself by Christina Fields
Have you ever wondered what other people think of you? It would be interesting won't it if everyone was open with their thoughts although this could cause some upset if you don't want any bad news.
It's never going to happen,Some people might assume OCD is simply being used as an excuse for not having to do certain things, of course,perhaps even streaks of genius, so it's important that you assess your behaviour and self awareness to give yourself a chance in bonding with people and being liked.
Understanding yourself
The art of understanding yourself is all about how you see yourself reacting to events going on in your life.
Being Self Aware
The more self-aware you are, the more able you are to understand others and yourself, which will benefit every aspect of your life.
You will begin to identify the things in life that make you happy and this, in turn,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, will encourage you to challenge areas of your life that you take for granted.
Think about the good and bad things in your life
There will be things in your life which are good and make you happy. In contrast, there will be some areas of your life which you want to change.
Taking time to think about all aspects of your life is a great way of assessing your skills and interests and will help you focus on the areas which make you happy and satisfied.
Positive thinking
Incorporating new behaviours and positive thinking will go some way to eliminating any past failings.
Positive thinking will improve your self awareness, but it will also improve your confidence to enable you to make positive decisions in your life,notebook computer.
Positive thinking will also enable you to proceed confidently in any action you take, as you will feel more capable in your abilities.
This could simply involve you interacting with people in a confident, assured manner which makes you feel involved and part of a team.
Be honest with yourself
There is no point in being unrealistic, however. You know what your strengths and capabilities are; you just need the confidence to carry them out.
Don't focus on your weaknesses
Ask yourself what your strengths are as well as question what you feel you are weak at. We can't all be scientists or brain surgeons, but we can achieve success and happiness doing what we are good at.
By learning from your weaknesses, you can build a stronger future for yourself.
Identify the dominant emotions of your character
By identifying elements of your character and emotions, you can begin to understand who you are.
By analysing your thoughts and behaviours in a way that shows you where your attention is being focused, you will gain an insight into your strength of character.
Put your emotions to good use
Be happy with yourself and try to be friendly to people, even when they don't deserve it it will stand you in good stead in the future. Be strong and maintain your values people will look up to you for it.
Best wishes
Christina Fields
Have you ever wondered what other people think of you? It would be interesting won't it if everyone was open with their thoughts although this could cause some upset if you don't want any bad news.
It's never going to happen,Some people might assume OCD is simply being used as an excuse for not having to do certain things, of course,perhaps even streaks of genius, so it's important that you assess your behaviour and self awareness to give yourself a chance in bonding with people and being liked.
Understanding yourself
The art of understanding yourself is all about how you see yourself reacting to events going on in your life.
Being Self Aware
The more self-aware you are, the more able you are to understand others and yourself, which will benefit every aspect of your life.
You will begin to identify the things in life that make you happy and this, in turn,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, will encourage you to challenge areas of your life that you take for granted.
Think about the good and bad things in your life
There will be things in your life which are good and make you happy. In contrast, there will be some areas of your life which you want to change.
Taking time to think about all aspects of your life is a great way of assessing your skills and interests and will help you focus on the areas which make you happy and satisfied.
Positive thinking
Incorporating new behaviours and positive thinking will go some way to eliminating any past failings.
Positive thinking will improve your self awareness, but it will also improve your confidence to enable you to make positive decisions in your life,notebook computer.
Positive thinking will also enable you to proceed confidently in any action you take, as you will feel more capable in your abilities.
This could simply involve you interacting with people in a confident, assured manner which makes you feel involved and part of a team.
Be honest with yourself
There is no point in being unrealistic, however. You know what your strengths and capabilities are; you just need the confidence to carry them out.
Don't focus on your weaknesses
Ask yourself what your strengths are as well as question what you feel you are weak at. We can't all be scientists or brain surgeons, but we can achieve success and happiness doing what we are good at.
By learning from your weaknesses, you can build a stronger future for yourself.
Identify the dominant emotions of your character
By identifying elements of your character and emotions, you can begin to understand who you are.
By analysing your thoughts and behaviours in a way that shows you where your attention is being focused, you will gain an insight into your strength of character.
Put your emotions to good use
Be happy with yourself and try to be friendly to people, even when they don't deserve it it will stand you in good stead in the future. Be strong and maintain your values people will look up to you for it.
Best wishes
Christina Fields
Thursday, November 15, 2012
crushing twisted metal
Are You A Survivor? by Jeff Miles
The sound of screeching brakes, crushing twisted metal, a splatter of broken glass, and screams from inside the turned-over call. Call 911!
This is the first number that comes into your mind whenever an accident occurs.
Paramedics are called to the accident scene for a single purpose - to save lives. Upon approaching their patient, the first thing they do is look for vital signs. Vital signs include pulse and pulse rate, signs of breathing, movements, cries for help, and signs of consciousness all these represent a glimmer of hope showing that the patient is still alive.
Next thing that a paramedic does is to look for signs of possible fracture, internal bleeding,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, shock etc. They try everything to keep the victim comfortable and safe from further harm. The essence of their action is focused on one thing - to rescue.
Just like a paramedic, the coping attitudes of an individual in the midst of a crisis in life will determine his capability as a survivor. This time however, the paramedic is also the victim intent to rescue himself.
Having a goal, which is to win over an adversity,Now to say, will determine your survival. Consider the vital signs that characterize a survivor. You are a survivor if:
1. Your first instinct is to solve the problem and not point the blame. You find the real issue in order to find the best solution to overcome the problem. Unconsciously, some people focus their attention on the source of the problem. They ask who or what started it, in an effort to pinpoint blame.
However, is this the right time to do this? What good will it do now? The problem is already there. To capitalize on the problem in order to obtain absolution is self-serving. The best approach is to find the solution. From there, you can learn the lessons that need to be learned so as not to commit the same mistakes.
2. You seek help from other people. Talk to an expert on the subject surrounding the problem to find the best solution. Asking for support or assistance is not a sign of weakness; rather it is a sign of wisdom,Your Mindset Determines Your Life. Help from others could determine survival.
3. Your first reaction is to split the problem into manageable pieces. Work on the problem by fractions. Leave room to chew the food in the mouth. Fill the mouth to the brim and it won't be able to move.
4. You know when to rest in order to regain strength. It does not mean giving up totally. Keep proper pacing to ensure you have enough stamina and energy. You cannot think clearly when you are confused. Regain your composure. In the same manner, you cannot think when exhausted. Regaining strength and composure could be all you need.
5. You can be like a garter. Flexibility has its value so make use of it. There is constant need to reinvent your self to be updated. Muster enough courage to be a master of your feeling. If the inevitable becomes imminent, accept it as part of the scourge of life.
6. You can express negative feelings in a positive way. "I may not be an excellent leader, but I am a good team player." Likewise, you can express positive feelings and learn proper perspective in finding the right solution to the problem,I am writing.
7. You have confidence and trust that the problem can be solved. The future does not look as bleak as it seem. There is always a reason to be optimistic.
You are a real survivor the moment you can grasp mentally the essence of your action to a problem - the essence to rescue yourself.
The sound of screeching brakes, crushing twisted metal, a splatter of broken glass, and screams from inside the turned-over call. Call 911!
This is the first number that comes into your mind whenever an accident occurs.
Paramedics are called to the accident scene for a single purpose - to save lives. Upon approaching their patient, the first thing they do is look for vital signs. Vital signs include pulse and pulse rate, signs of breathing, movements, cries for help, and signs of consciousness all these represent a glimmer of hope showing that the patient is still alive.
Next thing that a paramedic does is to look for signs of possible fracture, internal bleeding,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, shock etc. They try everything to keep the victim comfortable and safe from further harm. The essence of their action is focused on one thing - to rescue.
Just like a paramedic, the coping attitudes of an individual in the midst of a crisis in life will determine his capability as a survivor. This time however, the paramedic is also the victim intent to rescue himself.
Having a goal, which is to win over an adversity,Now to say, will determine your survival. Consider the vital signs that characterize a survivor. You are a survivor if:
1. Your first instinct is to solve the problem and not point the blame. You find the real issue in order to find the best solution to overcome the problem. Unconsciously, some people focus their attention on the source of the problem. They ask who or what started it, in an effort to pinpoint blame.
However, is this the right time to do this? What good will it do now? The problem is already there. To capitalize on the problem in order to obtain absolution is self-serving. The best approach is to find the solution. From there, you can learn the lessons that need to be learned so as not to commit the same mistakes.
2. You seek help from other people. Talk to an expert on the subject surrounding the problem to find the best solution. Asking for support or assistance is not a sign of weakness; rather it is a sign of wisdom,Your Mindset Determines Your Life. Help from others could determine survival.
3. Your first reaction is to split the problem into manageable pieces. Work on the problem by fractions. Leave room to chew the food in the mouth. Fill the mouth to the brim and it won't be able to move.
4. You know when to rest in order to regain strength. It does not mean giving up totally. Keep proper pacing to ensure you have enough stamina and energy. You cannot think clearly when you are confused. Regain your composure. In the same manner, you cannot think when exhausted. Regaining strength and composure could be all you need.
5. You can be like a garter. Flexibility has its value so make use of it. There is constant need to reinvent your self to be updated. Muster enough courage to be a master of your feeling. If the inevitable becomes imminent, accept it as part of the scourge of life.
6. You can express negative feelings in a positive way. "I may not be an excellent leader, but I am a good team player." Likewise, you can express positive feelings and learn proper perspective in finding the right solution to the problem,I am writing.
7. You have confidence and trust that the problem can be solved. The future does not look as bleak as it seem. There is always a reason to be optimistic.
You are a real survivor the moment you can grasp mentally the essence of your action to a problem - the essence to rescue yourself.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
large photos
Enrich Your Relationship by Making Memories With Autistic People How? by Bonita Darula
Sharing memories with autistic people can enrich your relationship with them. How? There is value in sharing memories with an autistic person. For example:
* When you are talking about memories with a person who has autism it brings you and them closer together.
* No matter what age or who the individual is with autism, memories make connections of enrichment, because of what has happened,No matter what you do.
* Memories give force to positive emotions. You can talk about them, remember when "the good old days" were. By talking about them, you will develop laughter, warmth, tears, and you will probably want to keep on talking, and not stop.
There are many ways to make memories happen with an autistic person that will enrich your relationship with them. For instance:
* Make something happen by initiation. Start some new projects or family gatherings, new activities and make new friends. This will bring enrichment to an autistic person.
* Make it happen by setting aside a special time frame. Keep special dates open, to remind yourself, that is the time to make the memories with your autistic individual to enrich the relationship.
* Try to plan to make memories for the ones you share and love to be included. Talk about what happened, share stories, photos, humor, show and share souvenirs, and reflect on the good times.
* Making memories with your autistic individual reveals you care, and it will give you the opportunity to share the experiences, enrich your life and his or hers with autism. The relationship will become stronger,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
* Take pictures of the events to create memories. Create a slide show, and invite guests to watch and bring some refreshments. You might want to bring or show some souvenirs to add to the conversation that day.
By making memories whether it be a child or an adult with autism, helps their emotions,Why not tell your subconscious mind some really positive things before you nod off to sleep, by bringing and showing them the pleasant times that were spent with family and friends.
It is an excellent plan to have journal, and keep track of the special events that you have shared or want to share. This will enrich your relationship with the person who has autism.
I find one of the most creative ways to make memories with an autistic individual is through pictures, and visual aids. Pictures or photos of special events, family, vacations, and travel,into a package that is easy to grasp, can help the autistic individual learn, relate to the subjects, communicate and understand the variety of what goes on in our world.
Making memories will enrich your relationship, develop management skills, improve reading comprehension, have a better understanding of relationships with family, friends, places, past, and create new ideas for the future.
One of the things I have learned, to enrich a relationship with a person who has autism, is to use color or texture of certain objects that are related to the memories. For example, souvenirs, large photos, slide shows that you can put together with music, and colorful backgrounds, will make excellent memories.
Making memories with individuals with autism, will benefit you and your child, and bring about many positive emotions. It will enrich your relationship.
It is wise to be creative to make memories. Remember, to make special times, dates, activities on your calendar, for it to happen. Include your family, friends, neighbors, relatives, other children to participate in the event of making memories. Your relationship with an individual who has autism will be enriched.
Sharing memories with autistic people can enrich your relationship with them. How? There is value in sharing memories with an autistic person. For example:
* When you are talking about memories with a person who has autism it brings you and them closer together.
* No matter what age or who the individual is with autism, memories make connections of enrichment, because of what has happened,No matter what you do.
* Memories give force to positive emotions. You can talk about them, remember when "the good old days" were. By talking about them, you will develop laughter, warmth, tears, and you will probably want to keep on talking, and not stop.
There are many ways to make memories happen with an autistic person that will enrich your relationship with them. For instance:
* Make something happen by initiation. Start some new projects or family gatherings, new activities and make new friends. This will bring enrichment to an autistic person.
* Make it happen by setting aside a special time frame. Keep special dates open, to remind yourself, that is the time to make the memories with your autistic individual to enrich the relationship.
* Try to plan to make memories for the ones you share and love to be included. Talk about what happened, share stories, photos, humor, show and share souvenirs, and reflect on the good times.
* Making memories with your autistic individual reveals you care, and it will give you the opportunity to share the experiences, enrich your life and his or hers with autism. The relationship will become stronger,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
* Take pictures of the events to create memories. Create a slide show, and invite guests to watch and bring some refreshments. You might want to bring or show some souvenirs to add to the conversation that day.
By making memories whether it be a child or an adult with autism, helps their emotions,Why not tell your subconscious mind some really positive things before you nod off to sleep, by bringing and showing them the pleasant times that were spent with family and friends.
It is an excellent plan to have journal, and keep track of the special events that you have shared or want to share. This will enrich your relationship with the person who has autism.
I find one of the most creative ways to make memories with an autistic individual is through pictures, and visual aids. Pictures or photos of special events, family, vacations, and travel,into a package that is easy to grasp, can help the autistic individual learn, relate to the subjects, communicate and understand the variety of what goes on in our world.
Making memories will enrich your relationship, develop management skills, improve reading comprehension, have a better understanding of relationships with family, friends, places, past, and create new ideas for the future.
One of the things I have learned, to enrich a relationship with a person who has autism, is to use color or texture of certain objects that are related to the memories. For example, souvenirs, large photos, slide shows that you can put together with music, and colorful backgrounds, will make excellent memories.
Making memories with individuals with autism, will benefit you and your child, and bring about many positive emotions. It will enrich your relationship.
It is wise to be creative to make memories. Remember, to make special times, dates, activities on your calendar, for it to happen. Include your family, friends, neighbors, relatives, other children to participate in the event of making memories. Your relationship with an individual who has autism will be enriched.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
and let the idea of powerfulness integrate into your life.
Five Types of Affirmations for Empowerment
Five categories of affirmations support you in manifesting powerful change. These five categories or types of affirmations have emerged from my consulting work with clients and workshop participants. You may work with affirmations in every category concurrently, or you may focus on a different category each day or each week. It is important that affirmations you select resonate with you, that is, that they feel natural and appropriate. In order to experience this resonance, you may need to change words in the ones listed here as examples, or let these inspire you to create ones you prefer, or develop your own from scratch.
Popular Affirmations
Many popular affirmations are beautiful, indeed, they are quite extraordinary! However,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, if you do not believe them, they are useless or even counterproductive. If you say an affirmation you do not believe, saying it repeatedly will not make you believe it. Actually, the repetition can build up greater resistance to believing it. Consider this example: Sam feels powerless,for better or worse.. He has had many experiences that he can point to that justify his feelings and his belief in his own powerlessness and unworthiness. Saying "I am powerful" is less likely to erase his feelings of powerlessness than to prompt an emphatic reaction, such as, "Oh, no, I'm not!" If Sam does not deal with the resistance, he carries it with him as he lives his life.
An empowering process emerges by using these five categories of affirmations in a systematic way to assist you in embracing an affirmation that you desire to believe but do not. If you have an intention and a desire to say and believe "I am powerful," start by releasing powerlessness, open to the possibility of being powerful, affirm an intention and readiness to live in your power, claim your power, and let the idea of powerfulness integrate into your life.
Following are the five categories of affirmations described briefly with a few examples of each type.
Releasing/Cleansing Affirmations
The purpose of Releasing and/or Cleansing Affirmations is to let go of unwanted and unneeded stuff. Especially, they help you let go of resistance. They allow you to purify your system. These affirmations stimulate the release of toxins such as negative thought forms, repressed or suppressed emotions, old memories, negative bonds with others, karma, dark consensus reality, illusions of all types.
Examples:
* I give myself permission to release toxicity from every level of my energy field.
* I rescind outdated vows of poverty, celibacy, struggle, silence, and unworthiness.
* I release resistance.
* I let go of old programs that keep me stuck in old patterns.
* I let go of everything I do not want or need for my highest good.
Receiving/Accepting Affirmations
The purpose of Receiving and/or Accepting Affirmations is to open to allow something to be. They allow us to receive goodness from the Universe. They neutralize the misqualification of energy; that is, they can reverse illness or other density. In addition, they help us shift the attention from disempowering actions such as, "getting" or "taking" to more freeing concepts such as, "receiving" and "allowing" and "accepting."
Examples:
* I open to the gifts of the Universe.
* I allow abundance to flow through me.
* I accept support when I need it.
* Dear God, please let me know what to do in a way that I can understand.
* I accept peace and joy in all aspects of my life.
Being/Intending Affirmations
The purpose of Being and/or Intending Affirmations is to ground your purpose, especially your higher purpose,Because as I look back on the past years. These affirmations enhance conscious awareness of your intention about something or about your mission in life. In addition, these affirmations can deepen your understanding of your reason for being and/or acting generally or in a specific situation. They can be used to enhance any and all actions that follow.
Examples:
* I know that this is for the highest good of all concerned.
* I deepen my awareness of the consciousness from which actions spring.
* I live my mission.
* My intention is to live free from struggle, fear, and hopelessness.
* I remember.
Acting/Claiming Affirmations
The purpose of Acting and/or Claiming Affirmations is to bring something into manifestation or to direct the energy of your intention to appropriate manifestation. These affirmations bring into the physical experience those ideas that you hold in your mind and/or heart. In addition, these affirmations help you to claim your power and establish boundaries in relationships.
Examples:
* I act with high intention and purposeful awareness.
* I step into the world to live my mission in every word and action.
* I demand my good right now.
* I make every act an act of love (or freedom or mastery or hope, etc.).
* I am powerful. I am worthy. I am loveable. I am free.
Integrating/Embodying Affirmations
The purpose of Integrating and/or Embodying Affirmations is to allow the energy and meaning of the affirmations to merge with your consciousness. Affirmations and ideas that do not resonate, drop away. Integrating/Embodying Affirmations support us in knowing more deeply -- integrating -- what we have learned rather than introducing new information.
Examples:
* I integrate trust into every aspect of my life.
* I breathe love into my job, my body, my relationships.
* Yes to Life,self-control!
* Today is an opportunity for peace.
* I breathe in abundance, letting my whole body feel its energy.
Affirmations as Lifestyle
As you work more and more with intentional affirmations -- written, spoken, read, chanted, meditated upon -- you will make them part of your lifestyle. Affirmations are already working for (or against!) you. It is your job to select the ones you want to live by. Remember, you are already using affirmations every time you think or speak! If your current affirmations are disempowering, you can intentionally change them to ones that you choose to live by.
Copyright 2006 Marshall House
Five categories of affirmations support you in manifesting powerful change. These five categories or types of affirmations have emerged from my consulting work with clients and workshop participants. You may work with affirmations in every category concurrently, or you may focus on a different category each day or each week. It is important that affirmations you select resonate with you, that is, that they feel natural and appropriate. In order to experience this resonance, you may need to change words in the ones listed here as examples, or let these inspire you to create ones you prefer, or develop your own from scratch.
Popular Affirmations
Many popular affirmations are beautiful, indeed, they are quite extraordinary! However,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, if you do not believe them, they are useless or even counterproductive. If you say an affirmation you do not believe, saying it repeatedly will not make you believe it. Actually, the repetition can build up greater resistance to believing it. Consider this example: Sam feels powerless,for better or worse.. He has had many experiences that he can point to that justify his feelings and his belief in his own powerlessness and unworthiness. Saying "I am powerful" is less likely to erase his feelings of powerlessness than to prompt an emphatic reaction, such as, "Oh, no, I'm not!" If Sam does not deal with the resistance, he carries it with him as he lives his life.
An empowering process emerges by using these five categories of affirmations in a systematic way to assist you in embracing an affirmation that you desire to believe but do not. If you have an intention and a desire to say and believe "I am powerful," start by releasing powerlessness, open to the possibility of being powerful, affirm an intention and readiness to live in your power, claim your power, and let the idea of powerfulness integrate into your life.
Following are the five categories of affirmations described briefly with a few examples of each type.
Releasing/Cleansing Affirmations
The purpose of Releasing and/or Cleansing Affirmations is to let go of unwanted and unneeded stuff. Especially, they help you let go of resistance. They allow you to purify your system. These affirmations stimulate the release of toxins such as negative thought forms, repressed or suppressed emotions, old memories, negative bonds with others, karma, dark consensus reality, illusions of all types.
Examples:
* I give myself permission to release toxicity from every level of my energy field.
* I rescind outdated vows of poverty, celibacy, struggle, silence, and unworthiness.
* I release resistance.
* I let go of old programs that keep me stuck in old patterns.
* I let go of everything I do not want or need for my highest good.
Receiving/Accepting Affirmations
The purpose of Receiving and/or Accepting Affirmations is to open to allow something to be. They allow us to receive goodness from the Universe. They neutralize the misqualification of energy; that is, they can reverse illness or other density. In addition, they help us shift the attention from disempowering actions such as, "getting" or "taking" to more freeing concepts such as, "receiving" and "allowing" and "accepting."
Examples:
* I open to the gifts of the Universe.
* I allow abundance to flow through me.
* I accept support when I need it.
* Dear God, please let me know what to do in a way that I can understand.
* I accept peace and joy in all aspects of my life.
Being/Intending Affirmations
The purpose of Being and/or Intending Affirmations is to ground your purpose, especially your higher purpose,Because as I look back on the past years. These affirmations enhance conscious awareness of your intention about something or about your mission in life. In addition, these affirmations can deepen your understanding of your reason for being and/or acting generally or in a specific situation. They can be used to enhance any and all actions that follow.
Examples:
* I know that this is for the highest good of all concerned.
* I deepen my awareness of the consciousness from which actions spring.
* I live my mission.
* My intention is to live free from struggle, fear, and hopelessness.
* I remember.
Acting/Claiming Affirmations
The purpose of Acting and/or Claiming Affirmations is to bring something into manifestation or to direct the energy of your intention to appropriate manifestation. These affirmations bring into the physical experience those ideas that you hold in your mind and/or heart. In addition, these affirmations help you to claim your power and establish boundaries in relationships.
Examples:
* I act with high intention and purposeful awareness.
* I step into the world to live my mission in every word and action.
* I demand my good right now.
* I make every act an act of love (or freedom or mastery or hope, etc.).
* I am powerful. I am worthy. I am loveable. I am free.
Integrating/Embodying Affirmations
The purpose of Integrating and/or Embodying Affirmations is to allow the energy and meaning of the affirmations to merge with your consciousness. Affirmations and ideas that do not resonate, drop away. Integrating/Embodying Affirmations support us in knowing more deeply -- integrating -- what we have learned rather than introducing new information.
Examples:
* I integrate trust into every aspect of my life.
* I breathe love into my job, my body, my relationships.
* Yes to Life,self-control!
* Today is an opportunity for peace.
* I breathe in abundance, letting my whole body feel its energy.
Affirmations as Lifestyle
As you work more and more with intentional affirmations -- written, spoken, read, chanted, meditated upon -- you will make them part of your lifestyle. Affirmations are already working for (or against!) you. It is your job to select the ones you want to live by. Remember, you are already using affirmations every time you think or speak! If your current affirmations are disempowering, you can intentionally change them to ones that you choose to live by.
Copyright 2006 Marshall House
Sunday, November 11, 2012
You can keep moving toward your dream several ways - here are a few
What’s In a Dream? Wake Up to Yours and Find Out by Reggie Odom
What's in a dream? Shall I start large or small? Let's go with huge. Martin Luther King proclaimed "I have a dream!" in a passionate and moving speech in 1963 to promote a peaceful movement for the Civil Rights and economic equality of African Americans. His dream changed the face of the nation,The Awareness of Metaphysical Laws and Principles Part 3 by Leonard Lee. A life style change has followed that is now "in the bones" of the majority of citizens in this country. The way things were at that time in history is unimaginable to most people today, even those who lived during that time. Just as the way things are now would have seemed impossible to most people living then. It was not impossible to Martin Luther King, and those who had a similar dream or believed in his. This is one example of what's in a dream – the power to change reality, and the lives and relations of millions.
Then, of course, there are the Wright Brothers who had a dream of people flying in a machine and were dismissed by those who could point to research proving that what they dreamed was not possible. So much for research!
Another example of an inconceivable dream coming to life is that of my client's daughter. She has significant learning disabilities which kept her from being able to read in the fourth grade and for which she suffered greatly as a result. Yet she has something bigger than this - she has a dream. She is now 20 years old and entering her junior year of college where she is keeping her vision alive – to become a special education teacher. She has faced her fears of reading, learning and taking exams and recently passed the test that was required in order for her to continue her studies.
Impossible dreams come in all shapes and sizes. In fact, the dreams of most are considered impossibilities to others. We have all been thwarted from our dreams at one time or another by those who do not believe in dreams, who point to why things won't work rather than asking "why not?" It's not that they are bad people,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots; it's simply that their own dreams have been blocked.
As children, dreaming and imagining worlds and moments and ourselves as different,excel in sales when well prepared, grander, more fun, and alive was as natural to us as breathing. Yet this was considered "child's play," and not taken seriously by most adults – adults whose own dreams had been hindered or ridiculed. We learned to tuck our dreams away and grow up. We learned about "the way things are", "the way people are", the way "life is", and that the rest is impossible,at home, so why bother?
Let's take a look at this idea of "impossible" for a moment from the viewpoint of bumblebees. Did you know that aerodynamically it is simply not possible for bumblebees to fly? But have you ever tried getting a bumblebee to believe that? I don't know if bumblebees have dreams but it is clear they have a mission that precludes the impossibility of flying. And in some ways a mission is similar to a dream.
A dream is a deep desire; a vision of what you yearn to be, do or have that expresses the deepest truth of who you are. Dreams express an inner urge for growth, an urge for the expression of unrealized aspects of your authentic self. Dreams along with passion and callings pull you forward to your purpose or mission, to realize your fullest potential and to feel deeply alive.
Your dreams come from your imagination where the creation of everything begins. YOUR dreams come from YOUR imagination. Did you get the emphasis on YOUR? Your dreams can only come from you. No one can dream them for you because your dreams are unique to you. Likewise, you can't live someone else's dreams and be fulfilled. Many of us have attempted to live the dreams of others or the dreams they have for us, and often we do. However, when we are not living our own dreams, there is a desperation to our lives no matter how outwardly successful we may be. When we are not living our own dreams we are not fully awake or alive.
Look at the fact that bumblebees fly even though it's aerodynamically impossible as a metaphor for one of YOUR dreams that seems impossible. On one hand you have plenty of evidence that your dream is impossible - this could be in the form of beliefs and assumptions, research and statistics, "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts". Certainly you have never done it before, and very possibly nobody has. On the other hand, there is the saying, "Things are not always as they appear." What if your evidence were not the truth, not really the way things are, but rather only the way they seem or have been? What is one of your impossible dreams?
Take a deep breath and say it out loud to yourself right now before you read on? No one else will know. Now write it down, "My dream is . . ." Good!
I invite you to say "yes" to the dream you've just acknowledged, and to all of your dreams. When you do you are saying "yes" to your truest self. Remember dreams convey an urge to express unrealized aspects of your authentic self. When you live your dreams, you give others courage and permission to do the same. And since dreams can't live or be achieved in a vacuum, your dreams will create opportunities for others, either directly or indirectly.
Saying "yes" to your dreams usually requires courage and compels you to step outside your comfort zone. But if you want to wake up and feel alive, to live fully and authentically, what's the alternative? Take comfort that there is not a single authentic dream you have or will have that you do not have the ability to achieve. When you say a full-hearted "yes" to your dreams, the way will be shown and you will be given everything you need for the journey. The journey will take you home to yourself.
There is a simple formula for achieving any dream. It is as follows: Keep your dream alive and keep moving toward it.
You can keep your dream alive in several ways – here are two:
•Spend time every day envisioning your dream, in other words by imagining that it is true now:
• What does it look like; how does it sound, taste, and feel?
• Where are you? Who is with you or around you?
• What's it like being the person who has accomplished this dream? What is the expression on your face? How do you feel? What is your posture? Are you dressed differently? What are your relationships like?
•Tell others about your dream (but only those who believe in dreams and will believe in yours).
You can keep moving toward your dream several ways - here are a few:
• Have dream conversations - ask other people what their dreams are and tell them yours.
• Act on each idea concerning your dream that you are inspired by - you will be inspired.
• Say "yes" to the opportunities that come your way – there will be plenty of them if you respond
• Ask for help - the right people will be happy to help you.
• Today, take one action, however small, in the direction of your dream.
• Take one to three actions each day that will take you closer to your dream
Remember, the journey to your dreams will take you home to yourself and to experiencing greater aliveness.
You are a natural! You are brilliant! You are magnificent! Simply by being you. Let your light shine!
If you'd like to speak with me about igniting your dreams and living an authentic life, call today for a 30 - minute complimentary .
What's in a dream? Shall I start large or small? Let's go with huge. Martin Luther King proclaimed "I have a dream!" in a passionate and moving speech in 1963 to promote a peaceful movement for the Civil Rights and economic equality of African Americans. His dream changed the face of the nation,The Awareness of Metaphysical Laws and Principles Part 3 by Leonard Lee. A life style change has followed that is now "in the bones" of the majority of citizens in this country. The way things were at that time in history is unimaginable to most people today, even those who lived during that time. Just as the way things are now would have seemed impossible to most people living then. It was not impossible to Martin Luther King, and those who had a similar dream or believed in his. This is one example of what's in a dream – the power to change reality, and the lives and relations of millions.
Then, of course, there are the Wright Brothers who had a dream of people flying in a machine and were dismissed by those who could point to research proving that what they dreamed was not possible. So much for research!
Another example of an inconceivable dream coming to life is that of my client's daughter. She has significant learning disabilities which kept her from being able to read in the fourth grade and for which she suffered greatly as a result. Yet she has something bigger than this - she has a dream. She is now 20 years old and entering her junior year of college where she is keeping her vision alive – to become a special education teacher. She has faced her fears of reading, learning and taking exams and recently passed the test that was required in order for her to continue her studies.
Impossible dreams come in all shapes and sizes. In fact, the dreams of most are considered impossibilities to others. We have all been thwarted from our dreams at one time or another by those who do not believe in dreams, who point to why things won't work rather than asking "why not?" It's not that they are bad people,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots; it's simply that their own dreams have been blocked.
As children, dreaming and imagining worlds and moments and ourselves as different,excel in sales when well prepared, grander, more fun, and alive was as natural to us as breathing. Yet this was considered "child's play," and not taken seriously by most adults – adults whose own dreams had been hindered or ridiculed. We learned to tuck our dreams away and grow up. We learned about "the way things are", "the way people are", the way "life is", and that the rest is impossible,at home, so why bother?
Let's take a look at this idea of "impossible" for a moment from the viewpoint of bumblebees. Did you know that aerodynamically it is simply not possible for bumblebees to fly? But have you ever tried getting a bumblebee to believe that? I don't know if bumblebees have dreams but it is clear they have a mission that precludes the impossibility of flying. And in some ways a mission is similar to a dream.
A dream is a deep desire; a vision of what you yearn to be, do or have that expresses the deepest truth of who you are. Dreams express an inner urge for growth, an urge for the expression of unrealized aspects of your authentic self. Dreams along with passion and callings pull you forward to your purpose or mission, to realize your fullest potential and to feel deeply alive.
Your dreams come from your imagination where the creation of everything begins. YOUR dreams come from YOUR imagination. Did you get the emphasis on YOUR? Your dreams can only come from you. No one can dream them for you because your dreams are unique to you. Likewise, you can't live someone else's dreams and be fulfilled. Many of us have attempted to live the dreams of others or the dreams they have for us, and often we do. However, when we are not living our own dreams, there is a desperation to our lives no matter how outwardly successful we may be. When we are not living our own dreams we are not fully awake or alive.
Look at the fact that bumblebees fly even though it's aerodynamically impossible as a metaphor for one of YOUR dreams that seems impossible. On one hand you have plenty of evidence that your dream is impossible - this could be in the form of beliefs and assumptions, research and statistics, "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts". Certainly you have never done it before, and very possibly nobody has. On the other hand, there is the saying, "Things are not always as they appear." What if your evidence were not the truth, not really the way things are, but rather only the way they seem or have been? What is one of your impossible dreams?
Take a deep breath and say it out loud to yourself right now before you read on? No one else will know. Now write it down, "My dream is . . ." Good!
I invite you to say "yes" to the dream you've just acknowledged, and to all of your dreams. When you do you are saying "yes" to your truest self. Remember dreams convey an urge to express unrealized aspects of your authentic self. When you live your dreams, you give others courage and permission to do the same. And since dreams can't live or be achieved in a vacuum, your dreams will create opportunities for others, either directly or indirectly.
Saying "yes" to your dreams usually requires courage and compels you to step outside your comfort zone. But if you want to wake up and feel alive, to live fully and authentically, what's the alternative? Take comfort that there is not a single authentic dream you have or will have that you do not have the ability to achieve. When you say a full-hearted "yes" to your dreams, the way will be shown and you will be given everything you need for the journey. The journey will take you home to yourself.
There is a simple formula for achieving any dream. It is as follows: Keep your dream alive and keep moving toward it.
You can keep your dream alive in several ways – here are two:
•Spend time every day envisioning your dream, in other words by imagining that it is true now:
• What does it look like; how does it sound, taste, and feel?
• Where are you? Who is with you or around you?
• What's it like being the person who has accomplished this dream? What is the expression on your face? How do you feel? What is your posture? Are you dressed differently? What are your relationships like?
•Tell others about your dream (but only those who believe in dreams and will believe in yours).
You can keep moving toward your dream several ways - here are a few:
• Have dream conversations - ask other people what their dreams are and tell them yours.
• Act on each idea concerning your dream that you are inspired by - you will be inspired.
• Say "yes" to the opportunities that come your way – there will be plenty of them if you respond
• Ask for help - the right people will be happy to help you.
• Today, take one action, however small, in the direction of your dream.
• Take one to three actions each day that will take you closer to your dream
Remember, the journey to your dreams will take you home to yourself and to experiencing greater aliveness.
You are a natural! You are brilliant! You are magnificent! Simply by being you. Let your light shine!
If you'd like to speak with me about igniting your dreams and living an authentic life, call today for a 30 - minute complimentary .
Friday, November 9, 2012
but I'll do it later after I sleep in a couple more hours." No
The Reality of Fairies
No, I have never seen a fairy, an angel, nor any other type of a spirit guide. But I swear there are times I think that if I spun around fast enough they'd be sitting there snickering at me. Today's one of those days. Quite often, I sit up late at night working too many nights in a row. I also have a two year old bouncing off the walls first thing every morning. The combination means I am pretty much doomed to episodes of sleep deprivation every time my inner workaholic takes over. Not a big deal in and of itself, because all things come into balance and I'll end up spending a day or two lounging around doing a whole lot of nothing. Today was supposed to be one of those days,Does it seem like there is never enough time in the day. I went to bed giving myself guiltless permission to sleep in as long as I like. My teenagers had already offered to hang out watching cartoons with the little one for me. But then those wee folk decided that I had something far more important to do today. Bright and early before anyone else was awake,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, I was woken up by a persistent little voice telling me to write about fairies today. "Okay great, but I'll do it later after I sleep in a couple more hours." No, you're going to do it now! And so the nagging began.
I had thought we'd just sit here at the computer and they'd start babbling about something or other and I could just channel something from that higher realm that seems to only open up by invitation and never by my own insistence nor with any real regard to my own deadlines and work schedules. No, they wanted me to come up with something on my own. "Go ahead, tell them your own opinions and understanding about fairies." So, I spent about five hours today going through other people's websites about fairies to try and find my own opinion. Don't ask me to explain why I do things like that. Mostly, all it did was reconfirm that I really love Amy Brown's work and I would love to have her completely redraw the picture of a fairy taking the leap of faith that's on my home page. I also remembered a lot of the reasons that I've drawn some parallels in my own mind between angels, fairies, aliens, and spirit guides.
Here's an interesting explanation that I kept coming across today. I've had a long time love affair with fairies and am kind of surprised I never read this before. The story basically goes like this.... When the Proud Angel was leaving heaven and the other angels were following him out, Michael called out in a panic pointing out to The Father that all of heaven was quickly emptying. The Father demanded that the gates to heaven and to hell both be closed and locked immediately. It was done. He then declared that whoever was in was in and whoever was out was out. Those angels who had left heaven but who had not quite made it to hell yet were stuck here on earth and had to find residence in the hills, trees,the bear, and lakes.
Okay, so that could explain why I can't tell the difference between angels and fairies. But the question that I have is why were the angels leaving so fast that The Father literally had to lock the last of the angels in? Doesn't make it sound like the angels in heaven are there by choice does it? Weird story compared to the biblical teachings. But then again, it's out of the Celtic regions and I suppose that's what happens when you combine Pagan beliefs with Christian stories.
Another piece that I found very interesting was written by a psychologist in England in a chat forum. He did not believe in fairies at all and was pointing out how the ancient stories about fairies have incredible similarities to the modern stories about aliens. They both are known for abductions. They are both known for seducing and/or forcing sexual relationships to strengthen their own weak genetic lines. They are both known for stealing and swapping babies. They are both magical and levitate or fly. They are both green or gray. They are both shy and refuse to be photographed. They both disappear if you blink. There is no tangible scientific proof for either after thousands of sightings. They are both either short and ugly or tall and beautiful. They both are heard through telepathy rather than seen most of the time. They both have two different types - the good and helpful ones and the bad and evil ones. Guess what else... the beautiful ones are the good ones and the ugly ones are the bad ones regardless of describing aliens or fairies.
Now, compare what we know of the fairies and aliens to what we know of angels. Same thing. There are beautiful ones that are helping us and there are evil ones trying to have sex with us. Regardless of which word you use, little gray aliens, ugly little fairies, or the fallen angels - they all are visually hideous, greedy, selfish, rapists, child stealers, abductors, and just plain creepy. While the attractive aliens,self-employed woman, angels, and beautiful fairies are all helpful, guardians, light, loving, healing, musical, artistic, sexually innocent, and spiritually wise.
For me, it's all the same. It's just a matter of which words and stories you like best. There have always been stories of good spirits and bad spirits. We often feel their presence and can even hear them speaking to us telepathically sometimes, but don't quite catch a glimpse of them. I've also noticed that you can definitely tell which kind of energy they resonate with, good or evil. When they come to visit with you, you are surrounded in either love and lightness or something dark and heavy. I call the good guys angels and fairies.
Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge
No, I have never seen a fairy, an angel, nor any other type of a spirit guide. But I swear there are times I think that if I spun around fast enough they'd be sitting there snickering at me. Today's one of those days. Quite often, I sit up late at night working too many nights in a row. I also have a two year old bouncing off the walls first thing every morning. The combination means I am pretty much doomed to episodes of sleep deprivation every time my inner workaholic takes over. Not a big deal in and of itself, because all things come into balance and I'll end up spending a day or two lounging around doing a whole lot of nothing. Today was supposed to be one of those days,Does it seem like there is never enough time in the day. I went to bed giving myself guiltless permission to sleep in as long as I like. My teenagers had already offered to hang out watching cartoons with the little one for me. But then those wee folk decided that I had something far more important to do today. Bright and early before anyone else was awake,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots, I was woken up by a persistent little voice telling me to write about fairies today. "Okay great, but I'll do it later after I sleep in a couple more hours." No, you're going to do it now! And so the nagging began.
I had thought we'd just sit here at the computer and they'd start babbling about something or other and I could just channel something from that higher realm that seems to only open up by invitation and never by my own insistence nor with any real regard to my own deadlines and work schedules. No, they wanted me to come up with something on my own. "Go ahead, tell them your own opinions and understanding about fairies." So, I spent about five hours today going through other people's websites about fairies to try and find my own opinion. Don't ask me to explain why I do things like that. Mostly, all it did was reconfirm that I really love Amy Brown's work and I would love to have her completely redraw the picture of a fairy taking the leap of faith that's on my home page. I also remembered a lot of the reasons that I've drawn some parallels in my own mind between angels, fairies, aliens, and spirit guides.
Here's an interesting explanation that I kept coming across today. I've had a long time love affair with fairies and am kind of surprised I never read this before. The story basically goes like this.... When the Proud Angel was leaving heaven and the other angels were following him out, Michael called out in a panic pointing out to The Father that all of heaven was quickly emptying. The Father demanded that the gates to heaven and to hell both be closed and locked immediately. It was done. He then declared that whoever was in was in and whoever was out was out. Those angels who had left heaven but who had not quite made it to hell yet were stuck here on earth and had to find residence in the hills, trees,the bear, and lakes.
Okay, so that could explain why I can't tell the difference between angels and fairies. But the question that I have is why were the angels leaving so fast that The Father literally had to lock the last of the angels in? Doesn't make it sound like the angels in heaven are there by choice does it? Weird story compared to the biblical teachings. But then again, it's out of the Celtic regions and I suppose that's what happens when you combine Pagan beliefs with Christian stories.
Another piece that I found very interesting was written by a psychologist in England in a chat forum. He did not believe in fairies at all and was pointing out how the ancient stories about fairies have incredible similarities to the modern stories about aliens. They both are known for abductions. They are both known for seducing and/or forcing sexual relationships to strengthen their own weak genetic lines. They are both known for stealing and swapping babies. They are both magical and levitate or fly. They are both green or gray. They are both shy and refuse to be photographed. They both disappear if you blink. There is no tangible scientific proof for either after thousands of sightings. They are both either short and ugly or tall and beautiful. They both are heard through telepathy rather than seen most of the time. They both have two different types - the good and helpful ones and the bad and evil ones. Guess what else... the beautiful ones are the good ones and the ugly ones are the bad ones regardless of describing aliens or fairies.
Now, compare what we know of the fairies and aliens to what we know of angels. Same thing. There are beautiful ones that are helping us and there are evil ones trying to have sex with us. Regardless of which word you use, little gray aliens, ugly little fairies, or the fallen angels - they all are visually hideous, greedy, selfish, rapists, child stealers, abductors, and just plain creepy. While the attractive aliens,self-employed woman, angels, and beautiful fairies are all helpful, guardians, light, loving, healing, musical, artistic, sexually innocent, and spiritually wise.
For me, it's all the same. It's just a matter of which words and stories you like best. There have always been stories of good spirits and bad spirits. We often feel their presence and can even hear them speaking to us telepathically sometimes, but don't quite catch a glimpse of them. I've also noticed that you can definitely tell which kind of energy they resonate with, good or evil. When they come to visit with you, you are surrounded in either love and lightness or something dark and heavy. I call the good guys angels and fairies.
Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge
Thursday, November 8, 2012
3. When a goal is achieved and deserves to be rewarded
Introduction to Performance Coaching
Not too long ago ship captains could actually whip sailors who disobeyed orders,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots; managers could fire workers on the spot for virtually any reason, or even no reason at all; and students could be expelled from school for any minor infraction of the rules,comfort and possibly closure then I've done my job." - AMIRAH. Today, much has changed. Sailors have rights, workers have unions,and typically responds to treatment quickly. Early diagnosis is important to a successful recovery., and students are asked for input in the educational process.
The person in charge used to have unquestioned authority and ability to command and compel. Strict obedience was believed to be a necessity. Today, managers must focus on leading and persuading rather than ordering and forcing,Have you ever felt like doing something. In more and more industries today, especially retail, the never-ending supply of job applicants has dried up. Instead of "fire and replace," managers must develop the skills to "improve and correct." Leaders must learn effective performance coaching techniques and know how to convince workers to change their behavior in order to achieve organizational objectives.
The word "performance coaching" has been abused by some business experts, perhaps because they are less skilled in performance coaching techniques than they could be. Coaches in the business world run the gamut from well-trained professionals to rank amateurs who deal in unscientific methodologies. The true coach is a trained expert who understands the application of behavioral science concepts and human relations principles. It is important for us to remember that it is possible for managers to improve their coaching skills to the point where they can effectively change the inappropriate behaviors of employees into productive behaviors that drive organizational results.
One of the most critical skills a manager or executive must have is the ability to coach others to not only reinforce positive behaviors, but to also correct ineffective behaviors. I have studied a dozen different performance coaching systems and models in my professional career, but clearly the best one I've used is an Eight Step Model created by Drs. Steven Stowell and Matt Starcevich. It is described in their book titled The Coach, published by The Center for Management and Organization Effectiveness. As we explore performance coaching in this and subsequent articles you can gain additional information from the CMOE website.
First of all let's define what performance coaching is. It is an interactive communication and relationship process between leaders to team members, peers to peers, or even team members to leaders with the purpose of exerting a positive influence on people and/or the organization. Coaching enhances the behavior change, motivation, performance, awareness, and development of another person. Performance Coaching is typically an ongoing process of building a partnership for continuous improvement.
Now, let's consider when coaching is appropriate. This is an important discussion, because inexperienced coaches believe that coaching only takes place when something goes wrong. I've found eight situations when performance coaching should be considered by managers and executives. Notice that these situations are not all negative in nature. They are:
1. When performance improves and deserves to be rewarded
2. When performance declines and deserves to be corrected
3. When a goal is achieved and deserves to be rewarded
4. When a goal is missed and deserves to be discussed
5. When an employee exhibits an inappropriate behavior that doesn't affect his/her performance
6. During the regular performance appraisal process
7. When the employee deserves to understand his/her career opportunities
8. When it's just a good time to talk about how things are going
In every performance coaching workshop I have taught I have been asked if everyone will respond to a coach's attempts at coaching. In other words are there some people who are not coachable or resistant to coaching? The answer to that question is, regrettably, yes. Here is how the numbers break down. Fifty percent of the general population will respond favorably to a coach's attempts at coaching. In fact, the coach doesn't necessarily have to be highly effective or even follow the model very closely in order to achieve moderate results. So if you have ten employees and they are "average," or represent "general population," and you have a little training in coaching, then about half the time you should get at least reasonable results from your attempts at performance coaching. Now that's pretty encouraging!
Another twenty-five percent of the general population will respond to coaching, but it will take longer and require greater skills from the coach. This means that as a manager you will need to sharpen your coaching skills and develop patience with the coaching process.
Twenty percent, or one person in five of the general population is what psychologists label a "performance coaching challenge." These people may respond performance coaching, but it's likely to be a long-term process and any results you achieve may not be dramatic. Oftentimes, coaches get frustrated and give up before they see the results begin. Remember, these coaching challenges are capable of behavior change. It's important to give them a chance to improve. Patient coaches many times achieve good results from these employees; it just takes time, skill, effort and a little luck.
The final category of five percent is a group of our general population who struggle to even stay in the workplace. Turnover is higher in this category than in any of the other categories. Employees from this five percent group cause more frustration and irritation than from any other group. And, if there are any employees who could be classified as difficult to coach, or even "resistant to coaching," this would the category."
Not too long ago ship captains could actually whip sailors who disobeyed orders,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots; managers could fire workers on the spot for virtually any reason, or even no reason at all; and students could be expelled from school for any minor infraction of the rules,comfort and possibly closure then I've done my job." - AMIRAH. Today, much has changed. Sailors have rights, workers have unions,and typically responds to treatment quickly. Early diagnosis is important to a successful recovery., and students are asked for input in the educational process.
The person in charge used to have unquestioned authority and ability to command and compel. Strict obedience was believed to be a necessity. Today, managers must focus on leading and persuading rather than ordering and forcing,Have you ever felt like doing something. In more and more industries today, especially retail, the never-ending supply of job applicants has dried up. Instead of "fire and replace," managers must develop the skills to "improve and correct." Leaders must learn effective performance coaching techniques and know how to convince workers to change their behavior in order to achieve organizational objectives.
The word "performance coaching" has been abused by some business experts, perhaps because they are less skilled in performance coaching techniques than they could be. Coaches in the business world run the gamut from well-trained professionals to rank amateurs who deal in unscientific methodologies. The true coach is a trained expert who understands the application of behavioral science concepts and human relations principles. It is important for us to remember that it is possible for managers to improve their coaching skills to the point where they can effectively change the inappropriate behaviors of employees into productive behaviors that drive organizational results.
One of the most critical skills a manager or executive must have is the ability to coach others to not only reinforce positive behaviors, but to also correct ineffective behaviors. I have studied a dozen different performance coaching systems and models in my professional career, but clearly the best one I've used is an Eight Step Model created by Drs. Steven Stowell and Matt Starcevich. It is described in their book titled The Coach, published by The Center for Management and Organization Effectiveness. As we explore performance coaching in this and subsequent articles you can gain additional information from the CMOE website.
First of all let's define what performance coaching is. It is an interactive communication and relationship process between leaders to team members, peers to peers, or even team members to leaders with the purpose of exerting a positive influence on people and/or the organization. Coaching enhances the behavior change, motivation, performance, awareness, and development of another person. Performance Coaching is typically an ongoing process of building a partnership for continuous improvement.
Now, let's consider when coaching is appropriate. This is an important discussion, because inexperienced coaches believe that coaching only takes place when something goes wrong. I've found eight situations when performance coaching should be considered by managers and executives. Notice that these situations are not all negative in nature. They are:
1. When performance improves and deserves to be rewarded
2. When performance declines and deserves to be corrected
3. When a goal is achieved and deserves to be rewarded
4. When a goal is missed and deserves to be discussed
5. When an employee exhibits an inappropriate behavior that doesn't affect his/her performance
6. During the regular performance appraisal process
7. When the employee deserves to understand his/her career opportunities
8. When it's just a good time to talk about how things are going
In every performance coaching workshop I have taught I have been asked if everyone will respond to a coach's attempts at coaching. In other words are there some people who are not coachable or resistant to coaching? The answer to that question is, regrettably, yes. Here is how the numbers break down. Fifty percent of the general population will respond favorably to a coach's attempts at coaching. In fact, the coach doesn't necessarily have to be highly effective or even follow the model very closely in order to achieve moderate results. So if you have ten employees and they are "average," or represent "general population," and you have a little training in coaching, then about half the time you should get at least reasonable results from your attempts at performance coaching. Now that's pretty encouraging!
Another twenty-five percent of the general population will respond to coaching, but it will take longer and require greater skills from the coach. This means that as a manager you will need to sharpen your coaching skills and develop patience with the coaching process.
Twenty percent, or one person in five of the general population is what psychologists label a "performance coaching challenge." These people may respond performance coaching, but it's likely to be a long-term process and any results you achieve may not be dramatic. Oftentimes, coaches get frustrated and give up before they see the results begin. Remember, these coaching challenges are capable of behavior change. It's important to give them a chance to improve. Patient coaches many times achieve good results from these employees; it just takes time, skill, effort and a little luck.
The final category of five percent is a group of our general population who struggle to even stay in the workplace. Turnover is higher in this category than in any of the other categories. Employees from this five percent group cause more frustration and irritation than from any other group. And, if there are any employees who could be classified as difficult to coach, or even "resistant to coaching," this would the category."
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
7. Serve others
A Better Way of Life
I seemed to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.
There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.
So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.
1. Know your purpose
Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your true north every time.
This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.
2. Know your values
What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals for 2006 and beyond - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.
The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.
3. Know your needs
Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots!
4. Know your passions
You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.
5,If you will just realize that through deep Psychic - Concentration you. Live from the inside out
Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home,otherwise known as bribing.. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.
6. Honor your strengths
What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know with others.
7. Serve others
When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding,we cannot let go of something if we don't allow ourselves to acknowledge what we are hanging on to., much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.
Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.
I seemed to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.
There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.
So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.
1. Know your purpose
Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your true north every time.
This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.
2. Know your values
What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals for 2006 and beyond - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.
The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.
3. Know your needs
Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots!
4. Know your passions
You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.
5,If you will just realize that through deep Psychic - Concentration you. Live from the inside out
Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home,otherwise known as bribing.. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.
6. Honor your strengths
What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know with others.
7. Serve others
When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding,we cannot let go of something if we don't allow ourselves to acknowledge what we are hanging on to., much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.
Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.
Monday, November 5, 2012
is any kind of solution based dialogue from the other person
Trustging Oneself in the Job Search
I often talk to people casually about their lives and jobs,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots. (That is always a way to start a conversation. We ask the question: "What do you do"? often in our culture.)
Though I want to counsel or coach people about their lives and careers as a career coach, I do not buttonhole people just to make them buy my services. As above, it's usually what we talk about when we don't have other quesitons or answers to give about ourselves when we are initiating a conversation.
What does this have to do with trust? I find that after the beginnings of a mutual conversation about jobs or careers, the other person will switch to how they like or dislike their lives and jobs. They, invariably tell me about themselves and how they really feel.
The person talking to me often goes further in describing their true feelings. What doesn't happen, though, is any kind of solution based dialogue from the other person, if they are frustrated by their lives or jobs,Email---If you are spending more than 30 minutes per day on email. The people who are satisfied with themselves and their jobs talk about other subjects.
The dis-satisfied person stops and does not trust me to probe further,perhaps the goals you have set for yourself aren't the correct goals for you. I believe it is because trust for this kind of person is an issue. When a "semi-dis-trustful" person can go beyond the obstacle they have inside themselves,What do you listen to when facing tough moments, can a true conversation begin. It might take a few casual conversations to have this kind of person become genuine and trusting of others in the job game.
I often talk to people casually about their lives and jobs,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots. (That is always a way to start a conversation. We ask the question: "What do you do"? often in our culture.)
Though I want to counsel or coach people about their lives and careers as a career coach, I do not buttonhole people just to make them buy my services. As above, it's usually what we talk about when we don't have other quesitons or answers to give about ourselves when we are initiating a conversation.
What does this have to do with trust? I find that after the beginnings of a mutual conversation about jobs or careers, the other person will switch to how they like or dislike their lives and jobs. They, invariably tell me about themselves and how they really feel.
The person talking to me often goes further in describing their true feelings. What doesn't happen, though, is any kind of solution based dialogue from the other person, if they are frustrated by their lives or jobs,Email---If you are spending more than 30 minutes per day on email. The people who are satisfied with themselves and their jobs talk about other subjects.
The dis-satisfied person stops and does not trust me to probe further,perhaps the goals you have set for yourself aren't the correct goals for you. I believe it is because trust for this kind of person is an issue. When a "semi-dis-trustful" person can go beyond the obstacle they have inside themselves,What do you listen to when facing tough moments, can a true conversation begin. It might take a few casual conversations to have this kind of person become genuine and trusting of others in the job game.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
That is why we have this other beautiful
How to Consciously Choose the Life of Your Dreams by Richard Blackstone
Everything in life is a choice and your spiritual growth depends entirely on the choices you make and the spirituality information that you immerse yourself in. The key to creating the life of your dreams is to begin the process of understanding how important it is to be conscious and aware of the choices you are making and whether those choices are serving you or not,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
Relativity tells us that you can't know something as an experience until you first come to know its opposite. That is the purpose of the theory of relativity and all physical life.
That is why we have this other beautiful, magnificent and glorious ability in our lives called choice. We get to choose whatever it is that we desire. We can say "the devil made me do it" all we want, but the ultimate reality is that we make a choice about every decision we make in our lives.
Now comes the important question. Are you making your choices consciously or unconsciously? Really think about that one. Remember we are thinking up the life of your dreams here.
Are you thinking consciously or unconsciously? Think about that, consciously,we will have a tendency to project that judgment onto others.
Right now you are reading this article,Remember. You are fully in the present moment. Your mind is engaged. Your brain is processing the data. You are in a conscious endeavor to improve your life. Right now you are thinking consciously, but what happens when you stop reading this article? Are you going to go over and turn on the idiot box and watch the next generation of a "reality show?" Are you going to mindlessly subject yourself to the commercials that tell you to go out and buy the next best version of the useless material possessions that already fill your cupboards and closets and your life?
Is that what you call conscious living? Does that serve you? I'm not making judgments here; I am just making observations. It is entirely your choice as to what you fill your days and nights with. I just want you think about what you are thinking about because that is the only way that you can begin to think consciously.
If we are saying that life is a process, and we are, then we want to be awake and aware of that process. You can only do that if you are conscious that life is a process and then consciously aware about how the process works.
That's why you are reading this article. To understand the true nature of how things work. This is a conscious endeavor, which takes some concerted effort, but the rewards and riches that await you are worth the undertaking.
We are not thinking about short-term gratification. We are going for the long haul, the big picture, the effortless life that awaits us when we wake up to this clarion call to consciously view life as a process.
Telling ourselves that "the devil made me do it" isn't going to cut it anymore. You can only use that excuse when you are living unconsciously. Remember we are changing the way we are thinking and thinking different thoughts. Thank you Albert Einstein for telling us that you can't change your current situation by thinking the same thoughts that got you there,its a womans world.. You must change the way you are thinking and think different thoughts.
Start the process of consciously being aware of your current situation and the begin to consciously make choices that open up different avenues of thought that have the potential to create the life of your grandest dreams and aspirations.
Everything in life is a choice and your spiritual growth depends entirely on the choices you make and the spirituality information that you immerse yourself in. The key to creating the life of your dreams is to begin the process of understanding how important it is to be conscious and aware of the choices you are making and whether those choices are serving you or not,1984 Ugg Fox Fur Tall Black Boots.
Relativity tells us that you can't know something as an experience until you first come to know its opposite. That is the purpose of the theory of relativity and all physical life.
That is why we have this other beautiful, magnificent and glorious ability in our lives called choice. We get to choose whatever it is that we desire. We can say "the devil made me do it" all we want, but the ultimate reality is that we make a choice about every decision we make in our lives.
Now comes the important question. Are you making your choices consciously or unconsciously? Really think about that one. Remember we are thinking up the life of your dreams here.
Are you thinking consciously or unconsciously? Think about that, consciously,we will have a tendency to project that judgment onto others.
Right now you are reading this article,Remember. You are fully in the present moment. Your mind is engaged. Your brain is processing the data. You are in a conscious endeavor to improve your life. Right now you are thinking consciously, but what happens when you stop reading this article? Are you going to go over and turn on the idiot box and watch the next generation of a "reality show?" Are you going to mindlessly subject yourself to the commercials that tell you to go out and buy the next best version of the useless material possessions that already fill your cupboards and closets and your life?
Is that what you call conscious living? Does that serve you? I'm not making judgments here; I am just making observations. It is entirely your choice as to what you fill your days and nights with. I just want you think about what you are thinking about because that is the only way that you can begin to think consciously.
If we are saying that life is a process, and we are, then we want to be awake and aware of that process. You can only do that if you are conscious that life is a process and then consciously aware about how the process works.
That's why you are reading this article. To understand the true nature of how things work. This is a conscious endeavor, which takes some concerted effort, but the rewards and riches that await you are worth the undertaking.
We are not thinking about short-term gratification. We are going for the long haul, the big picture, the effortless life that awaits us when we wake up to this clarion call to consciously view life as a process.
Telling ourselves that "the devil made me do it" isn't going to cut it anymore. You can only use that excuse when you are living unconsciously. Remember we are changing the way we are thinking and thinking different thoughts. Thank you Albert Einstein for telling us that you can't change your current situation by thinking the same thoughts that got you there,its a womans world.. You must change the way you are thinking and think different thoughts.
Start the process of consciously being aware of your current situation and the begin to consciously make choices that open up different avenues of thought that have the potential to create the life of your grandest dreams and aspirations.
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